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I am a genetically mapped New York Giant football fan which pretty much makes me just like millions of other DNA doomed dummies who for some unexplainable reason innately pledge their allegiance to a set of colors, numbers and helmet symbols for eternity. Like Canadian geese, we partner with a team for life, through thick and thin, good times and bad, seasons ending in playoffs and seasons ending with top five choices. It is the football gene and if you have it, you understand. Alas, if only marriage could work the same.

The fact is it isnt like marriage. It is not that we are in love with our teams and our teams in love with us. If that were true, it would be like a relationship, requiring everyones needs to be met, resulting in fans dropping the souring attraction of one team for the empty promises of another. Nope, love is not involved. Its a pathetic, sad, lonely one way street that is determined at birth. You are what you are: a Steeler, a Charger, a Seahawk, a Bengal, a Buccaneer. Some of us taste sweet victories frequently, while others wallow in self pity perpetually. It is no different from some people being tall and some people being short. It is my hope that someday stem cell research will produce a treatment to help some of my suffering brothers; for example, change a Cardinal fan into a Cowboy fan, giving them some hope of enjoying a winning season before they die.

It is our game. We dont particularly delight in watching our teams flounder amidst a room full of fence sitters, people without the gene. Youre either with us or against us. And when it is late October and all we can think about is replacing coaches, players and team ownership, our shoulders slump as we prepare to endure the inescapable long November and December weekends in silent lonesome agony.

It is a terrible, terrible existence; worse than that experienced by other sport fans because there is so much time for so few games. This imbalance gives the true football fan plenty of time to trick ones mind to think with a few breaks here and a few calls there that a 1-7 start can miraculously turn into a 9-7 wild card berth, only to be soundly crushed eventually by the shear weight of the challenge.

But no matter how bad the season, we can all unite for that final game, the Super Bowl. We can all find a reason to like one team over another. Usually it is the result of some convoluted thinking that somehow our team is vindicated if the right team wins. For example, I was really pulling for the Seattle Seahawks in this last Super Bowl. Why? Because the NY Giants should have beaten the Seahawks. Everyone knows that. So if the Seahawks beat the Steelers, I could rest easier knowing we could have been there too. We could have been somebody.

Unfortunately, the Super Bowl has become tedious to watch for the genetically mapped fan. It seems as if the game is diced up and wedged into a five hour colossal commercial to the world of American self indulgence. The game is sixty minutes of play that normally takes two and a half to three hours to get through. The Super Bowl somehow shoehorns in two more hours from start to finish, thirty minutes right off the bat for scatting through what I think is the National Anthem, and then an additional ten minutes to flip the coin.

Every year it gets a bit more dramatic, a bit more long, a bit more embarrassing and a bit more intolerable. Just play the game! The players have worked so hard for this single game and the NFL pulls it out from under them with all the self serving promotion. For instance, this year they introduced a series of ten second clips throughout the game of despicable Super Bowl Trophy fondling, where key players from each team pose individually with the trophycaressing it, kissing it, and worse. You cant do that! Why its its its the epitome of putting on the whammy. They might just as well get the evil eye. Some of those guys are going to lose and when they do, they will have to live with the idea that they cursed the team with their ill-advised trophy antics. Theyd have to hold a gun to my head for me to do that. If the Giants ever get to Super Sunday again, to a player they better never ever touch that trophy, let alone even set eyes on it, before it is duly earned. The whole thing made me sick! I couldnt even eat another wing dripping in blue cheese sauce.

And what is going on with the half time extravaganza? Can we calm that thing down? Can we see more xs and os and less screaming clueless teenagers making a grown man cry. The game has become the opening act for a concert, rather than the other way around. There seems to be more concern about costume malfunctions than referee malfunctions, which there were plenty of. I suppose I could put the extra time to good use, like paint the house, but I dont want to. I want to stay involved in the moment of the battle. But these Vegas shows are killing my patience. And as bad as it is for the fan, it must be brutal keeping players focused in the locker rooms.

Having said all that, we know that most of the added time is due to the commercials. Ah, the commercials. It is all about the commercials. How can they extend the game to make a few more bucks on commercials? Why dont they give each coach ten time outs? Why dont they have two minute warnings every minute? Pretty soon, theyll have to start the game noon Saturday and have it end midnight Sunday. And the commercials arent even that entertaining anymore. Its killing me. The madness has to stop.

So here are some ideas to get the game that the real fans support so tirelessly back on track. First, eliminate the extra week prior to the game and shift the season so that the Super Bowl is played on Presidents Day weekend. Second, fix the refereeing by employing full time referee teams. Third, use the half time to honor the latest Hall of Fame inductees, or our troops, or Super Bowl MVPs of years pastmake it about the game or something noble, not about pop icons. If you want to have concerts, have them before the game starts. Finally, rein in the commercials.

What the NFL executives have allowed the Super Bowl to become is what is so unappealing about America to people who have no other lens. Everything is bigger than life. Everything is glitzy. Everything is so self important. Its a bad, media contrived face to the world. Please bring our simple, humble game back. Please let the players play the game they earned to play. Please stop the insanity.

Im beggin ya please!

It surely has a nice ring to it and would be a dream come true for the plethora of England fans who have never yet witnessed the creator of the beautiful game bring home the goods.

Although England have a pretty favourable group, with Paraguay, Trinidad & Tobago, and the dreaded Sweden; they will come through the group stages to the finals and then, with a bit of luck, stomp all over the opposition with verve and tenacity; if Wayne Rooney keeps his head that is.

As well as being a serious contender for the coveted Golden Boot Award, if England do indeed progress, Wayne Rooney is the key to Englands success in World Cup 2006 and the rest of the team and world know it. The guy is a physiological freak in terms of the sheer power and depth of attack in his possession and will simply rip through the best defences that any of the worlds toughest may throw his way. He already proved this in Euro 2004, Portugal, where he was a constant worry for the opposition and, of course, does so every week at Old Trafford.

Wayne Rooney is simply one man, though, and cannot do the job alone; he will need pace man magician Michael Owen at his very best, Beckham curling em in sweetly from the right, Frank Lampard bulldozing through the middle and Mr Sven Goran Eriksson not doing his usual trick of messing with formations and pulling off players at the wrong moment. In fact, England hasnt had such a brilliant compilation of players in years; its whether they can gel at the right time and do what the England rugby lads did in 2003.

One thing is certain though and perhaps will never change; anyone and everyone faced with England, ups their game rate by a noticeable margin. It seems that everyone wants to beat the Auld Enemy; hardly surprising beings as the country with the once largest of empires has, at one time or another, trounced on or been instrumental in shaping the modern world as we know it. It seems logical that someone would want to get their own back by beating the national football team.

Many of the England naysayers believe that the England team lacks the personality and passion to bring home the cup. Although a personality is great for the cameras, the one ingredient that is surely more important is playing the game of football and scoring goals, and with the current England line up we have the best chance since 1966. Roll on World Cup 2006